Tuesday, February 5, 2013

This is why I don't do housework....

     I ran across an interesting article last week that suggests that men who help with housework such as cooking, cleaning and shopping have sex less frequently than do their counterparts who assume more traditional gender roles like fixing cars, mowing lawns, and repairing things around the house.  The article is here (More housework, less sex.), it's a quick read, and my take on it is below.  

     "Honey" I called from across the room while unloading the dryer, "Did I tell you about the article I read this morning"?   "No", she replied from her perch on the couch, "But can it wait?  Sophia Grace and Rosie are on Ellen today, and you know how they crack me up"  "Sure" I replied and started to fold the clothes and separate them into piles for each room occupant. 

     I tried again while dusting the living room later, "Honey" I said softly, as to not disturb her sleep, but she looked so peaceful I let it slide, and figured I could talk to her later at the table, so off to make dinner I went. 

     "This chili is fantastic dear" she remarked a scant hour later, "it's even better than the steak that you cooked last night!".  Thanking her, I once again tried to broach the topic of that oh-so-interesting article but was quickly derailed by my 13 year old, who apparently needed more attention than I did and insisted on telling a long story about his day.    I made myself busy with doing the dishes, and vowed to try again after I finished that, oh and maybe mopping the floors, how do they get so dirty so quickly?"

    I got back from the quick trip to the store (while cleaning I noticed a few things were low, and figured I'd pop out to get them), and while putting the groceries away, I peered into the living room and not finding the missus, I heard a slight splashing upstairs, and quickly surmised she must be indulging in a hot bath.  This gave me time to do a quick vacuum of the living room, and not chance disturbing her TV time, so I did a  once over and went back to stocking our shelves. 

     Later as I clipped coupons on the couch, we watched some prime time and I planned to broach the topic again over the commercials, but then noticed her wine glass was empty, and having experienced that wrath
before, I smartly opted to re-fill it.  It predicated a trip downstairs to get a new bottle and while there I pulled a roast out of the freezer for tomorrow's dinner.  After opening the wine I went back into the living room with my show already in progress again (No biggie, they'll probably repeat those essential plot parts later anyway) and I started to settle in but noticed that it was close to time to tuck my son in, so I got his room ready and 15 minutes later rejoined my spouse.  No talking was possible now, we were getting to the good parts, although I was having trouble following now. 

     An hour later, after setting up the coffee, and refilling the cat's food and water, I eased myself into bed next to her.  "You look very fetching" I said to her and snuggled closer, knowing that my hard work today would surely be "rewarded".  "Thanks" she said, "but I hardly believe it, knowing how tired I am right now, it was an exhausting day. Hey, maybe you can tell me about that article you read, while you massage my feet?"

"I'd love to Honey, but I honestly can't remember now what it could have been about" 

This wheel wasn't in my bedroom before I wrote this blog, but all bets are off now.

1 comment:

cdyarger said...

Hmm, I did not realize you were writing fairy tales now!!! Great work of fiction, I must say!!! At least there is truth in advertising (the title is true)!