I could live vicariously through my lost jackets.

      My mother would be proud of me, well, maybe half-proud, is that a thing?  I always remember to take a jacket with me, it's remembering to bring it back every time that I struggle with. In this blog, I wonder about all those jackets, that I've left behind, and what kind of life that they are living now.....

     This wasn't an issue when I was a kid, I don't remember losing my jackets then, of course, back then I only had 2 coats.  I had a winter coat for winter, and a jean jacket for all non-winter seasons and as

I live in Western NY, they split their time equally.  I wore that jean jacket well after it went out of style, and I was sad the day I looked into the mirror and I had to recognize that it no longer fit my growing frame.  Even then, I retired it to the back of my closet but I don't think it's there anymore (I blame my wife, she hides my things), I have a vague recollection of giving it to someone I know, like my daughter or son, or nephew, but that could just be a false memory as a coping mechanism I developed due to the loss of the jean jacket, it was just that cool.  The first jacket that I remember losing was in a nightclub in Atlanta GA, and by then, thanks for my generous company, I had a half dozen light coats, wind-breakers and jackets. 

     I was out with a bunch of my coworkers, people from all over the country, who worked with me as foodservice pie salespeople (It's weird, right?).  It was late, and I carried that light windbreaker from bar to bar, sitting it next to me in big leather booths, until

finally one club had a coat rack.  I put it on there when I walked by the coat rack, but we left by another exit, so I had no visual clue to remind me to claim it, and so it got lost.  A few bars later I remembered that I had taken a jacket, but by then it wasn't feasible to navigate back, so it remains lost.  Since I lost it in a nightclub, I imagine that it has had an interesting life, being thrown over the shoulders of scantily clad beautiful women (If you've never been to Atlanta, trust me, you can't even picture how pretty the girls in that town are, and they do try to out-do each other when they dress to go out), listening to 10 years worth of modern music, and learning the latest dances.    Last

year I learned how to Dougie, I wonder if that jacket did?  I lost another jacket kinda like that in Alex Bay, where after a long night of bar hopping, I was headed back to our resort in a limo with a bunch of people and a guy riding in the limo was really giving me the creeps, pestering a girl that had been over-served.  As we exited, I offered to escort her back to her door, and she accepted.  I made sure she got into the room and listened for her to throw the deadbolt, and then headed off to mine, but my jacket remained in the limo. Chivalry is not dead, but it will lose you a jacket or two in the process.

     I've lost 2 jackets at the Sand Bar in Canandaigua, though they really aren't lost, I know right where they are, I just realize that I'm not getting them back.  My wife and I were leaving there one

Sand Bar opens May 1

night and ran into a poker buddy of mine with his wife.  It was getting later and chillier, and she hadn't taken a coat with her, so I offered mine up, figuring that I'd get it back at my twice a month poker group.  Shortly thereafter, however, I started playing less due to my travel schedule, and then I heard that couple was divorcing.  You'd be amazed how hard it is to slip "Did you get my jacket back?" into a conversation when your buddy is telling you about his soul-crushing divorce and ongoing custody dispute.  That jacket, I imagine, hangs in the front closet of where my friend used to live and now has witnessed the weekly transferring of kids from one house to the other, many times over. I'm not sure I want to live vicariously through that

one.   I've seen her out a few times and thought about asking to come over to get it, but as I think that through, I always get held hostage at the threshold with her telling me what a jerk my buddy was, so I'm simply not getting that one back. I lost a nice black Nike windbreaker to my sister Hummingbird down there one night too, and she simply refuses to give it back.  Admittedly it looks pretty good on her, so I've written that one off.  I'll bet you that windbreaker gets out a lot, she'd married to a fireman and they love dining out in Rochester, which is something I never think to do. She raves about one place, Good Luck, and though I've never been there, I'll bet my coat has. 

  My last few lost coats were lost to family too.  My son Dan started borrowing one of my black mid-season Reebok coats while he was in high school and it ended up following him to college.  You would think that, that would be the coat to live vicariously through, but I think my current coats get out more than that one does, it seems to spend a lot of time on the Internet and gaming.  He's young

My Dad's coat

though, so there is still hope.   My wife has a coat or two of mine, but since we spend so much time together, those aren't ones that I would want to live vicariously through, but I do travel a lot too, so feel free to tell me what she has been up to while I'm gone (Smart money is on laundry and track meets) One of my prized coats was just returned to me from my sister, She-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named.   It's a 30-year old green workman's coat with a red quilted liner with paint specs on it that was my Dad's.  He wore it in his electrical, plumbing and heating business, and I likely left it at her house one day.  It used to smell like paint and plumber's putty.   She kept it for a while, but she had a better conscience than Hummingbird, so she returned it recently.  It smelled of family outings like hikes, bike rides, sledding, and fall boat rides.   I'm not sure that smell will come out, and I'm not sure it is supposed to either.